News about The Futility Review

 

Startup Activity

4 February 2007 TFR begins as the first literary journal dedicated to the rejection of all submitted work    
5 February 2007 TFR launches a state-of-the-art web site    
6 February 2007 TFR initiates online submissions processing    
7 February 2007 TFR makes its first series of rejections, beginning with the collected works of Rilke    
7 February 2007 TFR makes history, becoming the first publication with a 10 difficulty ranking    

Promotional Activities

The editorial staff of Poet's Market has graciously declined our request to be listed.  However, they have provided us with what our listing would look like if we were in the publication:

 

THE FUTILITY REVIEW

Longmont CO 80501. E-mail: info@futilityreview.com. Website: www.futilityreview.com. Established 2007. Contact: Jeffery Bahr, managing director. Member: CLMP (pending).

            • Highest difficulty rating on An Approximate Print Journal Ranking site (www.jefferybahr.com/Publications/PubRankings.asp).

Magazine Needs The Futility Review, published annually in print and online, is "dedicated to the non-publication of the finest poetry in America. All submissions are subjected to a multi-tier hierarchy of editors dedicated to treating all poets, and their works, with the same degree of empathy and discrimination." Wants "your best work only, and have a preference for guile over craft. We are particularly fond of paradelles." Does not want: "Poems must not include the words 'limn,' 'shard,' or 'numinous.'" Has "avoided publishing poems by almost every major poet." The Futility Review is digest-sized, printed on demand, saddle-stitched (catgut), with cover with "easily available artwork," includes ads. Receives about 3,000 poems/year, accepts 0%. Press run is "most often none"; distributed free to the homeless. Number of unique visitors: 250/week. Single copy: free; subscription: free.     

How to Submit Submit 3-5 poems at a time. Lines/poem: no restrictions. Considers simultaneous submissions; no previously published poems. ("Previously published" includes poetry posted on a public website/blog/forum as well as poetry posted on a private, password-protected forum.) Accepts e-mail (as attachment) and disk submissions; no fax submissions. Cover letter is unnecessary. "The excellence of your work will be reflected in the quality of the rejection. We also accept submissions by singing telegram." Reads submissions year round. Poems are circulated to an editorial board. Sometimes comments on rejected poems. Guidelines available by e-mail or on website. Responds in 2 weeks. No payment. Acquires first North American serial rights. Rights revert to poets upon publication.      

Advice "You’ve been rejected by the rest, now get rejected by the best. We strive to maintain a very high quality of rejection notices."
 

What Poets Are Saying About The Futility Review


Hey! I've been selected not to appear in the Winter 1999 issue of The Futility Review, alongside such poets as Kim Addonizio, Denise Duhamel, Didi Menendez, Joyelle McSweeney, and AD Thomas, among others — also not to appear.      −  Barbara Jane Reyes

I would like to take a moment to thank all of the nonstaff who did absolutely no work to make my nonappearance happen and for making their nonappearances in the invisible Futility Review offices. I greatly enjoyed not sending in my poems, not being considered for publication and then not appearing in your magazine — except by way of a list demonstrating my nonappearance. −  Deborah Ager

Rejected once again! −  Eduardo C. Corral

. . . it's an honor to "not appear" alongside such luminous figures as Joshua Clover, Danielle Pafunda, Tony Tost, Jordan Davis, and Matthea Harvey. If you're going to get the finger from a journal, that's a pretty damn strong group of writers to get the finger with!  −  Seth Abramson

Press Release:  The Futility Review Rejected Menendez' poems one year ahead of every else ... −  Didi Menendez

As I said in this post, I'm quite taken with The Futility Review. −  Nancy Breen, editor of Poet's Market

How did I come to join this club? I'm...honored.  −  Sandra Beasley

Niice   −  Suzanne Frischkorn

It is with regret that we are unable to accept the rejection by The Futility Review at this time, due to the high volume of excellent rejections we receive on a daily basis. Please consider rejecting us again.  −  Robert Archambeau

OMG! That is hilarious. I feel so honored to NOT be included.  −  C. Dale Young

I won't believe it until I see Lin Lifshin's name appear.    −  Jilly Dybka